“Everyone wants to be chosen.” 

…for the basketball team, for the choir, for the board of directors, for the relationship, for the job. I remember the pure anxiety that would ricochet through my body as we lined up against the wall. All seventh grade girls flooded with nervousness, but the order in which we’d be picked for the schoolyard game, would determine our place, our rank in the school, and as our premature minds made us think, the world. 

Who’d get chosen first? Who’d go second? Who’s third? Who’s not getting chosen at all? Well I was that girl many times, the one not chosen and left to revert to a dark corner in the school hallway crying and wondering if this scenario would play out throughout my life.

And sometimes it has.

I haven’t been chosen for so many things I signed up for; jobs, teams, relationships, and to be honest, I’m quite fine with that.

Over the past few months I’ve found myself counting disappointments, tracking let downs and recording set backs. As a freelance journalist, my jobs come on a day by day basis.

“Hustling hard pays the bills.”

So when I get a call about a potential deal or gig, I’m stoked! Like supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!!! So imagine being in talks with a potential client, having several meetings and apparently on your way to an amazing hosting gig, but it feels like the rug gets pulled from under you. Gig gone!

Now go ahead and imagine this happening twice…in one week!! I swear, this is enough disappointment to drive someone crazy, but…

“There’s a dark beauty in not being chosen.”

I’ve learned that life is sometimes like a mean old lady dangling candy in front of a kid. Every time he reaches his hand out for it, she wickedly moves the candy farther away. Sometimes our goals are like this.

The truth is; you will face disappointments when you apply for a job, when you apply for a promotion, when you audition for a part in a movie or play, when you try out for the team, when your relationship doesn’t work out, when the cheque still isn’t ready and at first sight, it looks like everything is crashing down.

Here’s why not being chosen sometimes, is A-OK!

“A set back is a set up for the come back”

Truer words have never been spoken! Sometimes when you think the distance is growing between your and your goals and things come crashing down…it’s all a set up! I like to think of disappointments like a slingshot; something that pulls me back so far from where I want to be. But oh, when it releases me, it releases my full potential, my full strength, my power and I go even farther than I imagined I could! Set back. Setup. COME BACK!

“What sometimes looks like disappointment is actually destiny. ”

Preparation for something greater

Sometimes your blessings are gearing up to come 10-fold! So while you applied for the position of assistant manager, they turned that down and want to make you manager; they denied your spot on the team, because they actually want to make you coach. Mad because you didn’t get the promotion? Well maybe they turned down that application to give you a spot in the boardroom at the company’s headquarters. See where I’m going with this?

What you think is for you just might not be 

As humans we want what we want and we do what we have to to get it. But what if it wasn’t for you to begin with? What if the job, the gig, the team, the spouse you thought was for you really isn’t a good fit? Don’t even sweat it. If it never happens, it was never meant to be.

So whatever happened to my “failed” gigs you ask? Well, those disappointments were preparation for something much bigger! I’ll keep you posted! 😉

“Greater is always waiting for you! “